Human

Once upon a time,
A human rose to walk the Earth,
But didn’t know what it was.

Answers came without an invite:
Human was told it was a She,
And there were others who were He.

So human learned to be a She.
And She was told how to play,
What to enjoy and what to desire.

Then they spoke of the colour of the skin,
Power and money, jobs, borders, sex.
Humans are just animals, people are categories.

She was told what to do,
Because that was the way to learn,
And She acted accordingly.

Then, one day, lightning struck,
Through Her body which now felt strange
Made Her conscious of Her skin.

The spark of wisdom, of being aware,
Played tricks on Her memory.
She remembered her life as a human vividly.

Between the instinct and the learned
She didn’t know what was the truth.
Between it all, who was She?

Lies, lies, all they said!
We are rules, but we are freedom,
We are both but we are neither.

The Liebster Award

liebster-award

I’m been nominated for the Liebster Award by Shyla Fairfax-Owen from Beyond the Threshold. Thank you and I’m so sorry it took me this long to write this post. (See her post HERE) Honestly, I get quite nervous when I have to tag people, because I don’t want to leave out anyone I really want to tag and I also don’t want to bother the people who do not like this kind of thing. Anyway, I will tag some people this time. Also, I’d really like to say that  Beyond the Threshold is a blog with so many great stories and you should all check it out! So, let’s start!

The rules:

  • Thank the person who nominated you and post a link to their blog.
  • Display the Liebester Award on your blog.
  • Share 11 random facts about yourself.
  • Answer 11 questions your nominator has asked.
  • Nominate up to 11 bloggers with less than 1000 followers.
  • Ask them 11 new questions or the same ones you were asked.
  • Let the bloggers you nominate know!
  • Copy the rules into your post.

11 Random Facts About Me

  1. I don’t believe in the cat-person dog-person distinction. – I love both cats and dogs and I don’t see why one should exclude the other. Love all the animals! 🙂
  2. I collect postcards. – I love to travel, but I also like it when other people travel and bring me postcards. Travelling is amazing and it makes you a richer person, and postcards make me remember that.
  3. I have a poster of John William Waterhouse’s “The Lady of Shalott” in my room. – I bought it when I was in London and it’s one of my most prized possesions. I love the painting and I love the poem by  Alfred, Lord Tennyson.
  4. I own a sword. – It’s not sharpened, though. XD It was a gift from my parents. I’m a self-proclaimed pacifist, but am weirdly obsessed with swords. Maybe because of all the fantasy stuff…
  5. I love Disney films. – I feel like I’ve mentioned this before, but never mind. Sometimes I just listen to the songs, especially the villain ones.
  6. I love Emilie Autumn. – Have you ever listened to her? Well, most people I talked to don’t like her, but I think she’s amazing. Especially the “Opheliac” album. Wonderful.
  7. I love gothic-inspired outfits. – And my favourite colour is black. XD
  8. I love plushies. – I still have quite a few in my room. Childish? Yes, but I’m not sorry for it. 😉
  9. I loooove chocolate. – Who doesn’t, right?
  10. I’m a Slytherin. – On every quiz ever. I took the Pottermore quiz twice and both times I got the same. I thought I would be a Hufflepuff, honestly. But I’m kind of proud for being a Slytherin. 😉
  11. I really don’t know what else to say, so I’ll just mention that I’m currently reading Grief is the Thing with Feathers by Max Porter and I think it’s really good and unique.

Q & A

  1. How did you come up with your blog concept? – Well, I just wanted to create a place to talk about books and post some of my stories, and it started from there.
  2. What inspires you to keep blogging? – The books I read. And when it comes to stories, anything can spark my imagination. Something happens, and the idea just comes. I can’t explain it any better.
  3. What are you currently reading (or most recently read)? – I’ve just finished Evelina by Fanny Bourney, it was more fun than I thought it would be. And I already said what I’m reading now.
  4. What’s the scariest book you’ve ever read? – I’ve read some scary books, but the most disturbing one for me was American Psycho. I loved it, and I though it was really well done, but it is quite disturbing.
  5. Are you a night owl or a morning bird? – I’m more of a night owl, since I hate getting up early, but I like late mornings.
  6. What in your life are you most proud of? – This is a really hard one… I don’t really know what to say. XD
  7. Who is your hero? – It may sound cheesy, but I’ll say my parents. They are great.
  8. Do you have a phobia? If so, what is it? – Not really, but I’m quite afraid of dark (I slept with lights on when I was a child) and public speech.
  9. If you were to write the story of you, what genre would it be and why? – I would personally like to be in a fantasy story, and meet dragons. Does that count?
  10. What is the best movie you’ve seen recently? – It wasn’t that recently, but I’ll say Birdman. I really liked that movie.
  11. What’s your biggest pet peeve? – When someone is just too irresponsible. In most cases, other people have to suffer for it.

My Nominees

So, here are the nominees:

Dara ReidyrMorgan MillsD. Wallace PeachEmmaRenKrystalFictionatrix and The Blonde Writer

Don’t feel like you have to do this, it’s fine if you don’t want to, but I wanted to nominate you so that you know you’re great. 🙂 And for the questions:

  1. If you could own a fictional/fairy tale/fantasy pet, what would it be? Why?
  2. Do you have any pets (real ones XD)?
  3. What are your favourite films?
  4. What’s the last book you’ve read and would you recomend it?
  5. If you could choose your theme song, which song would it be?
  6. People often ask about favourite characters, but I would like to know who your favourite villains are? (Either from books, films, tv…)
  7. What are some of your favourite names?
  8. What is your favourite time of the year?
  9. Coffee or tea?
  10. Moonlight or sunshine?
  11. Share a quote! (From anything you like.)

 

 

Quote for Thought: Anne Brontë and Censorship

Images from Wikipedia

Images from Wikipedia

“…when we have to do with vice and vicious characters, I maintain it is better to depict them as they really are than as they would wish to appear. To represent a bad thing in its least offensive light is, doubtless, the most agreeable course for a writer of fiction to pursue; but is it the most honest, or the safest? Is it better to reveal the snares and pitfalls of life to the young and thoughtless traveller, or to cover them with branches and flowers? Oh, reader! if there were less of this delicate concealment of facts – this whispering, ‘Peace, peace,’ when their is no peace, there would be less of sin and misery to the young of both sexes who are left to wring their bitter knowledge from experience.”

Anne Brontë, preface to the second edition of The Tenant of Wildfell Hall

Let me start by saying that The Tenant of Wildfell Hall is an amazing novel. Sadly, Anne Brontë had to defend it from the critics who thought it was overly graphic and disturbing – and her sister Charlotte was one of those critics. Anne Brontë never became as popular as her sisters during her lifetime and only lately was her novel re-discovered and given the attention it deserved.

So, what was so disturbing about The Tenant of Wildfell Hall? It is a story about a woman who escapes from her abusive, alcoholic husband and in the end finds happiness. The husband, Arthur Huntington, and his lifestyle are presented in a realistic, honest manner. And that was what bothered Anne’s contemporaries. Today, no one would find the novel too graphic. However, this opens some questions about many books that get banned today for similar reasons.

I have to say I agree with Anne Brontë completely. Life can be gruesome and horrible, and literature should be allowed to present it as it is. I know some people are sensitive to graphic imagery, and that is fine, they should be warned about it so that they can avoid the books which disturb them. However, this doesn’t mean that such books should be banned. Literature, and art in general, has the right to question and to provoke.

You can read the entire preface by Anne Brontë HERE, it is great, and short. But I can’t resist to add just one more sentence:

All novels are, or should be, written for both men and women to read, and I am at a loss to conceive how a man should permit himself to write anything that would be really disgraceful to a woman, or why a woman should be censured for writing anything that would be proper and becoming for a man.

Quite opiniated and maybe not as meek as she was usually protrayed, eh?

Looking into Her Eyes (Gideon’s perspective)

I look into her soft amber eyes and I know my revenge is near.

She smiles at me and I feel sorry for her. None of it is her fault. I don’t understand why she married a man so horrible as Maximillan Reming, but I guess she had no choice. She doesn’t seem to belong in the Reming family. Even her children have their father’s icy blue eyes, the cold eyes of a murderous predator whose only purpose in life is to slaughter his victims.

My wife was one of them. Prey which escaped Maximillian’s bony fingers. He couldn’t accept that she chose me. She was promised to him, and he even bought her an expensive diamond ring. She couldn’t say no to him. No one ever said no to a Reming. Except maybe for a Thorne.

When we met, we new right away that we were meant to be. And I was never a romantic type. My dear Alessia, if only I never asked you for that dance, never begged you to escape with me, leave the ballroom and enjoy the night. If only you said no. Then, you would still be alive. Maximillan’s wife, but alive.

I would give anything to bring you back, but I know that’s impossible. Maximillan caused that cursed fire, and you were gone, forever. I see you in our daughter, our lovely Celestine. She looks a lot like you and I love her with all my heart. But I still cannot escape this anger that’s boiling inside of me. I still seek revenge.

I hope you can forgive the woman in my bed. Eliana Reming took the role you never wanted, by Maximillian’s side. She is innocent and fragile. You know how terrifying he is even better than I do. You understand that Eliana, too, wants to escape. She looks at me like I’m her saviour. She knows about my sorrow, but can’t see that I’m bitter and vengeful.

Maximillian took my wife away from me, and now I’m taking his. Eliana is mine.

She smiles at me and I smile back.

I look into her soft amber eyes and I know I’m falling in love.


Gideon Thorne is Celestine Thorne’s father. If you are interested in other characters, here are the links to their stories:

Alexandra Reming

Theo Reming

Celestine Thorne

Quote for Thought: Life goes on

quote-for-thought-goth

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.”

Robert Frost

Life can’t really be explained and it has no rules, even when certain magazines claim there are. It is as diverse as the people living it. But we all know one thing for sure – life can be hard. It doesn’t ask for our opinion, it just goes on, whether you had the time and strength to keep up or not. You will get sad, disappointed, let down, insecure, anxious, stressed, and hurt. But there will be times you’ll simply feel good about yourself. You will look back on your past sorrow and feel no pain at all.

I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m not even trying to be inspirational. If you’re sad, be sad. Cry. Hit your pillow. And I admit that sometimes there will be things in your life that you will never be able to remember without evoking some old feelings. Time doesn’t always heal all of our wounds, but it teaches us to live with them. Then, you will remember something, or someone, and still feel a little bit of that past hurt. But you will also know that you have survived it. You will say to yourself: “I feel much better now.” You will know: “My life is better today.” And it will give you strength to go on.

Mother and Daughter (Celestine’s perspective)

“This is your new room”, he said, but it doesn’t feel like it. To me, the bed I’ve slept in is strange and undoubtedly his.

I don’t know what made me fall for that man. He kidnapped me. But somehow, he persuaded me it was for my own good.

“I loved your mother”, he said. “You look just like her.”

I saw my mother’s pictures, but I never thought we looked similar. We both had green eyes, but my skin is darker, more like father’s. Her hair was brown, like melted milk chocolate, while mine is almost black. My nose is a bit too wide. Her nose was perfect and her lips full. Still, Eric claims we look almost the same.

As I grew up, the figure of my mother was an omnipresence, almost a deity. She died in an unfortunate accident in a toy factory when I was only two. Sadly, I can’t say that I remember her. I don’t know what her voice sounded like or how she moved. I don’t know how it felt when she held me. All I know is what my father told me. And to him, she was perfect.

I wanted to be like her, but I doubted I ever could. My father described my mother as a graceful lady. I, on the other hand, had his temper and his rash nature. I always made decisions too quickly, which meant I made a lot of mistakes. I wasn’t the best student and I didn’t have many friends. Sometimes, I was proud of it. Proud of my strong opinions, proud that I never took anybody’s shit, even if it meant acting not-so-lady-like. Still, any comparison with my mother flattered me more than it should have.

Was it the reason I fell so quickly for Eric Leigh? Maybe it was part of it. I felt such a strong attraction towards him, an attraction so illogical that I was willing to accept any possible explanation and at the same time I believed none of them.

“You hate injustice just as I do, and you hate the elite”, Eric said and he was right. “Your mother felt the same way, but they convinced her that she was wrong. They dragged her into the world she never wanted to be a part of!”

Since Eric Leigh appeared in our lives, or better to say re-appeared, I’ve learned new things about my mother. I realized she was human after all. She had a friend who wanted to change the world, two years younger Eric who loved her with all his heart. My father told me the story because he wanted me to be prepared for what was coming. He also said that my mother never loved Eric back. He was like a younger brother to her. My mother was supposed to marry Maximillian Reming, my father’s opponent in many things, even in love. Eric said she never wanted to marry Maximillian, but she couldn’t refuse. Nobody could refuse a Reming. And then, just before the wedding, she fell in love with my father. Maximillan never forgave them. In the end, he caused the fire in the factory, the fire that killed my mother. He had his horrible revenge.

Eric, however, had a different story to tell. He said that my mother and him were the closest two people that ever existed.

“Of course your father thinks she never loved me. He doesn’t know what true love is! They all played tricks on her, they trapped her into their elitist, corrupt world!”

In the end, I told him he was right. I told him I hated elitism as much as he did.

“We will change the world! I will be the king of the new city of Cyron, and I wish for you to be my queen!”

I didn’t notice how ironic it was for someone to claim he hated elitism and then to call himself a king. My thoughts were fleeting, my mind dizzy from all that was said. He kissed me and I kissed him back. Now, I know it was a bad idea. I know the one he wants is my mother and I’m quite certain he’s crazy. But what if he can really change the world?

I decide to go for a walk around the house. Eric even has a swimming pool. I still don’t know how he managed to get such a wonderful house.

I get dressed clumsily and leave the room. I close the door behind me and as I turn around, two blue eyes greet me coldly.

“Theo?! What are you doing here?”

I’m almost certain I’m hallucinating.

“Well, I know what you are doing. Sleeping with Eric Leigh.”

“I don’t understand… Why are you here?” I ignored the deprecatory tone of his voice.

“It’s none of your business. But I thought I should warn you, for old times’ sake.”

Old times. A horrible expression to describe what we had. Even now, I tremble as I try to look at him. I thought it was all behind me, but now I just want him to hold me and to tell me everything’s going to be fine. I made a horrible mistake, Theo, another horrible mistake! Once, you told me you loved my quirky, irrational behaviour. You told me it was great that we were opposites and that you wouldn’t want me to change. And now? Have you changed your mind? Were my flaws too much for you after all?

“Eric Leigh is dangerous”, he said instead. “And do you really want him to kill your father in the end?”

I felt like crying. No, not now. I almost never cry and this is a horrible moment to start. I had so many questions, and so many apologies, but Theo turned and left.

What have I done?


P.S. Here are the links if you want to read the previous stories about the characters from the same world, the city of Cyron:

  1. Alexandra
  2. Theo